I saw Baz Luhrmann’s Australia on the weekend – it was the Australia Day weekend after all. As a consequence Baz is Jerk of the week for simply making such a crap film.

Why was the film crap? Three reasons:

1. Racist. Why didn’t you just tattoo “nobel savage” on the forehead of the Aboriginal Grandfather? Little known fact: Aboriginals have been known to stand on two legs from time to time.
2. Why would you make that film in 2008? I don’t understand why you would make an Australian Gone with the Wind 40 years after that era. Shouldn’t we be looking forward? Should we be trying to do something new? Let’s innovate a little.
3. Australia has always been an urban, coastal country. Baz has managed to add himself to the long list of people that perpetuate the myth that all Australians are drovers and probably have pet Kangaroos. We have never been like that and it’s not a productive mythology. Why can we present Australia the way it has always been, a very urban country.

All that said, the film was pretty.

In case you missed it, here’s what Germaine Greer had to say about it.

And here’s Marcia Langton’s reply to Greer.

What can I say, he’s always given me the shits. “Come on”, hand to the forehead looking like an emu. Cheering the opposition’s mistakes – never a good look.

Problem is he’s a nobody these days. Ranked 80th (I think), knocked out of his home tournament in the first round, but he still attracts front page headlines.

So Lley, you’re jerk of the week, just retire gracefully and get off the front page of the paper. Then again, he never won gracefully so maybe that’s a little too much to ask.